What is it that you really need?
"Many years ago, I spent an entire lunch hour with a middle age woman who wanted my advice on¬†the colour of shoes to wear with¬†a particular dress for a wedding.¬† We looked at all the colours¬† on the dress and¬†decided that a pair of¬†red shoes would be the best option.¬†¬†A few minutes later, she¬† opened her bag and¬†pulled out a¬†brand new pair of red shoes¬†which she had just purchased that same morning. I remember looking at her and thinking,¬†'Why on earth did you make me spend my lunch hour trying to help you¬†make this decision?""¬† To say the least, I was quite upset. I was¬†25 years¬†younger when that incident happened and I am glad that I have grown some wisdom and forgiven myself for getting upset at the woman. I too¬†have taken other people's time and consulted them on things which I had already decided upon.¬†¬†Now, I have¬†quite a bit of experience listening to other people as they share their experiences and seek advice about something or the other.¬† What I have learnt¬†is that most of us¬†already know what we want or need.¬† However, it seems that we need approval, confirmation or permission from someone else to confirm what we already know.¬†I used to think that some things are just common sense and in some cases I have been shocked at decisions made¬†by someone, even after a lengthy discussion.¬†¬† In fact, I have been surprised at¬†some of the decisions I have made myself, even after much consultation with others.¬† Some have turned out right and others not at all right. In all of that, I have learnt that: a) We all have an internal guidance system - intuition, which automatically kicks in and knows the right thing for us. b) When we seek other's permission, approval, confirmation about decisions we have already internally decided, it is because we have learnt not to completely trust ourselves. How can we grow our internal trust more? Try listening to yourself first and act on what comes to you "