Everything is just something – until you give it a VALUE

Everything is just something

In one household…

She took all the jewellery away from her daughter because she felt that her daughter did not show any interest in the beautiful collection of gems which were given to her over several years. She was upset that her daughter simply did not connect with the precious, expensive stones. She seemed to find far greater joy in designing colourful beaded bracelets. Twenty years later, she became an art and crafts teacher, a profession which brought great happiness to her.  Her mother is still perplexed about the lack of enthusiasm towards the beautiful gems.

In a big city…

She looked at the handbag in the store which was valued at $750.00. She wondered who would pay that kind of money for a handbag.  A bag is just a bag.  A $20 one is just as good as the $750.00 bag. She consciously chose to move on to the next store. Going to expensive handbag stores suddenly became a no-no for her. It was one less stop when shopping.

In another country..

He visited a small island and fell in love with it.  More than anything else in the world, he wanted to live in this space where he felt rich and free at the same time.  He went back to America, sold everything he had and made a home on the island. The tides that lapped at his feet in the early morning was priceless. He became an island man, married an island girl, had three island children and used his experience to help others understand the importance of choosing a lifestyle which speaks to you from the heart and soul.

Across the world…

The pain from her childhood casted a dark shadow over her life. She lived in fear, paralysed that she would die like her sister did. The nightmares rolled over and over in her mind until she decided to claim her life and use her sister’s death to educate others about drunkard driving. The pain lessened as she gave value to the experience. After many years, she realized that she found purpose in life, through the pain that she suffered.

In the basement…

He lived with the regret of spending much of his hard earned money drinking and partying in his younger days.   He felt that he should have been wiser and saved more money.  One day, he threw the regret out of the window and re-framed the party going days as some of the best days of his life. He got pictures of his friends and wrote a letter to all of them to reconnect and laugh about the past. The rekindling of friendship has made him a happier person. He has given new value to his past.

Everything is just something, until we give it a personal value.  Pain can be transformed. Regret can be healed. Love can be restored. Purpose can be found. Sometimes we have great treasures but we are not aware of their high value.  We can easily lock ourselves in a prison – simply because we cannot re-frame our experiences.   Sometimes, we spend days and nights and years on things which has no value to us simply because we are going along with the crowd.

Be mindful of the moments that create your future… what are you adding value to?  What is adding value to you?

Live your future now… re-define your experience so that it adds value to your life and the lives of others.

Love,

Mags

Can you live ‘in the bother’ of it all and ‘be with what is’?

“I can live my life now ‘in the bother of it’… I can live in the uncertainty of things and know that uncertainty is not a place of fear and it is o.k to take time to figure things out in that space of uncertainly” Orin Saunders, business man from New York City at the International Black Summit in Ottawa, August 4th, 2013. Part of his life experience is in my previous blog.

I have thought about this and I realize how often we want to fix things,get things right, look perfect, give more than we have, get upset if it does not work out according to how we planned it… But what if we just accepted to live in the bother of it?

Yesterday, I planned to meet a friend after work. On my way to our planned meeting place, I got a text that said something important came up and she could not make it. The first moment left me completely upset because I had rushed through my workout at the gym just to be able to meet with her. Then I reminded myself to “be in the bother of it.” and that everything would be fine.
What triggered my upset? I was looking forward to seeing her and I had given up something important to be with her.
Did I complete my part to be with her? YES
Was there anything more I could do about the situation? NO
Did it make the relationship any less special? NO because even though I was not a priority for some reason now, does not mean it has been like this. Further more, I don’t have all the facts to make a judgement on why she cancelled.

And so a smile broke on my face after I had cleared my head with my feeling of disappointment. Suddenly I heard a squeal and right in front of me was a friend I had not seen for about 8 years whom I had thought of for the longest while. I had lost her contact information and only knew her by her first name. We were so excited to see each other and kept on hugging each other over and over again. We had a lovely spontaneous dinner together…it was a beautiful evening.

Maybe ‘living in the bother’ does not always manifest itself into something that instantaneous but I know that from my own personal experience, “being with what is” and “accepting what is” no matter what is going on in our lives, creates a deep trust within our hearts and souls to be at peace with ourselves. Life speaks to us through all the ups and downs in our lives. If we can live and be perfectly comfortable with ‘the bother’, we will continue to trust life… all will reveal itself in time.

TuneIn today to our own ‘bothers’. What triggers them? Is there something we need to take to completion? Maybe or maybe not. Can you StepUp and be with what is, without needing to fix or solve it?

Love,
Magdalene